Are Republicans evil?

For many the above is a rhetorical question. Not wishing to jump to such a conclusion myself I decided to find out the only way I knew how. By going undercover with the GOP...

When I informed my Democratic party colleagues of my plan their reaction surprised me. Sure, they were curious about what info a mole could discover but some were genuinely concerned about my personal safety. Surely that was going too far thought lil ol liberal me.

You may be surprised to learn the McCain camp doesn't have a headquarters in Houston. So instead I called into the local branch of the Republican party in the city and was greeted with open arms. My spiel about supporting McCain cause he is in favour of legalising the Irish Americans won em over. In my defence I didn't tell them any blatant porkies.

Did I mention I was on the Obama campaign since April? Well they never asked.

It may come as a disappointment to some readers that they weren't burning effigies of Senator Obama. What went on in the GOP office was standard campaign fare. Think phonecalls, flogging yard signs and stuffing hundreds of envelopes which I was assured is a classic Republican tactic.

Where did they differ was the type of person who volunteers for McCain's campaign. Most were women around my mother's age (sorry mum) with the occasional female in their 20's. More about them later.

Running the operation was a larger than life character and hardcore Republican who for potential legal reasons I shall refer to as Fred. Literally one of the first things Fred told me after I revealed my nationality was that he spoke to an Egyptian guy who couldn't get over America was going to elect a Muslim. It was a sign of things to come.

Not wanting to give myself away I kept a low profile and eavesdropped on conversations on my first day with my new pals. One such gem was a discussion involving a bunch of women in their 50's about an email of religious prophecies which is going round predicting McCain's impending triumph.

A lady piped up and said, "McCain isn't saved by Jesus Christ but when he gets elected he will become born again." To a casual observer it seemed to validate why he is going to get her vote come November.

Curiously none of the Republicans I spoke to said John McCain was their first choice for their party's nomination. Most preferred Fred Thompson or Mike Huckabee. The inclusion of a certain Alaska Governor on the ticket has changed all that and sales of 'Read my Lipstick' and 'Sarah Palin will make a great President' stickers were doing a healthy trade.

For my amusement I told Fred I'd been asked to register to vote about 20 times. He chuckled and said, "Well that's not something you'll be hearing much about round here." History shows that when the turnout is low it favours the Republicans and one things for sure that will not be the case this time round.

Gaining more confidence (and their trust) I got the neck to ask more questions of my hosts. Do they really believe their opponent is a Muslim?

"Barack Obama has been associated with Islam for too long for it to just to be a coincidence," said one volunteer.

They questioned Obama's patriotism and Fred was impressed with McCain's defence of Obama at a red meat town hall meeting last week.

"John McCain showed why he is a good man by defending him. Obama might say he's a family man but one things for sure he isn't getting anywhere near my family," said Fred.

Perhaps familiarity breeds contempt but the longer I spent with the Republicans the more willing they were to spew vitriol in my presence. Or maybe it was just because I was diligent at stacking the 'Re-elect Republican judges' fliers.

A lady buying a yard sign said, "Obama must be destroyed," while another said, "He hates America."

Worse was to come. Much worse.

Amidst all the hatred I struck up a conversation with the Republican equivalent of my good friend Ken. Hank as he shall be known was more balanced and raised some interesting points.

"Obama is from the east end of Chicago and has associated with radicals in the past. That calls into question his character and the American public deserves to know more about him. Is he going to be getting advice off former terrorists if he gets into the White House?"

More relevant were Hank's views on the tone of this year's election.

"Negative campaign ads work when they are done right. There will be more of them no doubt. This year's election is really a referendum on Barack Obama. Will the country be safe with him in charge?"

Twas reassuring to know they weren't all bigots. Then I encountered Jean (not her real name).

At first glance Jean has the 'butter wouldn't melt' look. Aged 24 she's the kind of girl my mother would like me to bring home. Then she spoke.

One of the more printable statements she uttered in my presence was, "I used to hope Obama would get assassinated but that would make him a martyr. Now I just hope he gets some kind of disease and dies instead."

My proverbial jaw hit the ground and it was hard to remain calm when such rhetoric was being spewed. Jean was utterly convinced Obama was a Muslim, hates America and plans to destroy Israel. Oh and he wants to kill babies too.

What was particularly disturbing was her hate filled chants geed up the handful of volunteers in the office. They genuinely believe this shit.

I tried to rationalise with her even resorting to quoting Richard Nixon (see below) but it made no difference. According to her I'm a "Post modernist idealist." She's probably right though she did omit my self righteous moniker.

After two days of absorbing all of this I reached a rather terrifying conclusion. In the whole the Republicans I "palled around with" were in the main decent people. They made sure I never went hungry and gave me a lift back to my residence each night. Well a few blocks away.

What they are though is ignorant and paralysed with fear. Obama and the media are their enemy. Anything that represents a contrast to their ideology is immediately shot down (literally according to some) and must be "destroyed."

It made me sad to be around people, a small few a similar age to me, who had so many good qualities but diluted it all but believing such garbage. No one is suggesting Barack Obama is the perfect man, he says as much himself, but to suggest he is an enemy of the state made me weep inside.

As my second day drew to a close I accepted the offer of a lift from Jean's mother. Go ahead and call me a hypocrite but it was a long walk instead! We chatted and it was evident Jean was a chip off the old block.

Still trying to reason with them as we approached my final destination near the Houston Holocaust Museum I ventured, "That museum is a testament to hatred." Not that it made any difference.

I realise this a rather lengthy post and I shall be writing more about my Republican experience in the next few days. For those of you still interested the Richard Nixon quote I gave Jean was something he said as he was departing the White House.

"Always give your best, never get discouraged, never be petty; always remember, others may hate you, but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them, and then you destroy yourself."

Not that she got it or anything. Then again there weren't any pictures of Nixon in the Republican headquarters. He's been erased from their history and so has that sentiment he so memorably gave.

Pic: Yours truly trying to keep a straight face at the Republican headquarters in Houston.